In The Waiting

I believe that we all have a wait of some kind, perhaps yours looks different than mine; however, we are all waiting......

Some people are waiting for that dream job, others are waiting for a boyfriend, others have the boyfriend and they're waiting for the ring, perhaps some are waiting to become homeowners, while others have a home but it is empty because they're waiting for a baby, what is your wait? Healing from a diagnosis? For your marriage to take a miraculous turn? For your prodigal child to return home?

While my wait may have looked "different than yours," I am confident that we shared some of the same emotions during the wait: anger, sadness, doubt, confusion, and so much more.

Although it's okay to "feel your feelings," it's what you do with them that matters the most! Are you deserving of a miracle baby but your body is not cooperating? You have a right to be sad and even frustrated! Are you waiting for your boyfriend to propose to you after having patiently and faithfully waited on him, yet he doesn't......you have a right to be angry! Have you been a good wife and yet your husband cheated? You have a right to be heartbroken!

But.... remember just a couple of things:

“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.

Ephesians 4:26-27 NIV

God is giving us full authority and permission to feel what we need to feel, to include anger; but in your anger, do not sin! Cry out to God and tell him that you are angry, and ask him to supernaturally replace that anger with peace that surpasses all understanding!

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18 NIV

I promise you that in your brokenness, God is near, he is with you - he even weeps with you! Some may ask and/or wonder "why does God allow me to suffer through this?" While the answer to your specific circumstance may not be found in this blog, please understand this: Gods plans are better than your very own! Sometimes the "wait" is a simple method of protection from our Heavenly Father over your life. I promise you that his timing is ALWAYS better than our own. Sometimes the "wait" or the trial is simply Gods way of showing his power through you, he wishes to use your testimony to reach others......wow, what an honor to be used by God! Remember the story of the man that was born blind who Jesus healed? The Disciples asked Jesus why this man was blind? They asked if this was a result of him sinning or perhaps his parents sinning; in other words, was this his punishment? Jesus answered NO to both of these questions, he said that this happened so that Gods power can be seen through the miracle of healing the blind man.

The same was true for me in my wait, my wait for a baby for over a decade.

God was protecting me from wrong timing and he wanted to use my testimony to provide hope to the hopeless, he supernaturally healed me of infertility!

So what do you do during the wait? You hit your knees!

You come to God with all that you have inside of you, the pain, the anger, the questions, the doubt, all of it. You ask God to help you forgive, because forgiveness sets you free. (Sometimes it's God that you are angry at - especially when you don't understand the reason for your "wait.")

You ask for a transformation of heart and a renewal of mind, you ask God to help you understand his love for you in greater ways than you ever have. When you begin to understand the depth of Gods love for you, you begin to understand that he is not punishing you, he is working it out for you according to his perfect will.

When I finally understood that God loves me how I've never been loved, that he IS FOR ME, my prayers changed. I no longer prayed for what my heart desired the most, as a matter of fact the Holy Spirit convicted me; I began to realize that the deepest desire of my heart was taking the place of the throne where God should have been placed. I was worshiping the desires of my heart more than I was worshiping the Healer. So I began to pray: "God, I know you can, but EVEN if you don't, I will follow you, I will love you, I will trust you, and I will serve you. I understand that your plans for me far supersede my own and I pray for increased trust in this season of waiting."

What followed for me? Breakthrough, healing (that began in my heart), and miracles!

I pray the same for you, I pray for peace, discernment and revelation from the Holy Spirit for your specific circumstance, and for healing of your pain - in Jesus name!